Author Archives: Connie

The Twixtmas Trap and the Myth of the Fresh Start

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Because frankly, “New Year, New You” is a total shit idea.

The annual circus has arrived. Right on cue, we’ve hit that “Twixtmas” stage—that weird, blurry week between Christmas and the New Year where the “New Year, New You” industrial complex kicks into high gear.


I can’t look at a screen without being bombarded by adverts for PureGym memberships or “life-changing” masterclasses. My social feed is a toxic sludge of Dry January manifestos and, recently, people shouting about military calisthenics in the freezing cold. Even the supermarkets have swapped the mince pies for those “low-fat” rice cakes—which, for anyone watching their blood sugar, are basically flavoured cardboard disks that spike your levels if you even look at them sideways.


It’s a collective fever dream of performative productivity, and frankly, it’s a shit idea.


1. The Myth of the “Fresh Start”
The idea that you need a specific square on a calendar to change your life is the ultimate form of procrastination. If you’ve been sitting on your arse waiting for January 1st to “start” something, you’re not just behind—you’re probably going to quit.

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When the Coos Come Home: My Christmas Out of Office Manifesto

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If you remember my summer OOO, you’ll know the Highland Coos had the right idea: stand in a field, look majestic, and ignore everyone. Well, I’ve officially taken their lead for the Christmas break. My pasture has simply moved indoors for the winter.

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The Holiday Hustle: Your 2025 Guide to Not Losing It

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Christmas. The most wonderful time of the year, they say. Whoever “they” are clearly didn’t have to coordinate school nativity costumes, work deadlines, Secret Santa for seventeen different groups, and the small matter of keeping tiny humans fed, entertained, and vaguely civilised throughout a two-week break.

For working parents, December isn’t magical—it’s a full-contact sport. Self-employed? Add that delightful 24/7 mindset where your brain never quite switches off and you’ve got yourself a proper festive nightmare wrapped in tinsel.

Here’s what I’ve learned: you can actually enjoy Christmas with kids. Not the Instagram version with matching pyjamas and elaborate Elf on the Shelf scenarios. The real version, where you’re occasionally horizontal, sometimes laughing, and definitely not white-knuckling your way through every moment.

The trick? Lower your standards, raise your boundaries, and remember that rest isn’t selfish—it’s strategic. When you drag yourself back to work in January running on fumes and Quality Street, you’re no good to anyone.

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Week 5: The Paper Accounts Trap: Ignoring the Mandate for Software-Only Filing.

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🛑 STOP Being Stupid: Week 5 of 40

read time: 4 minutes

The Paper Accounts Trap: Ignoring the Mandate for Software-Only Filing.

The Fax Machine Mentality is About to Get You Fined

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Your Mission Drift Prevention Toolkit (Or: How to Say No to the Wrong Money)

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Right. Last week I told you about Emma and Haven House, and how saying no to £200,000 turned out to be the smartest decision they ever made.

Now comes the tricky bit: how do you actually make that call when the money’s sitting there and your budget’s looking thin?

Because it’s easy to read a nice story and think “yes, that makes sense.” It’s much harder when you’re staring at a funding opportunity that could solve your financial problems, even if it doesn’t quite fit what you do.

So let’s build you a toolkit. Not a complicated strategic framework that needs a consultant to interpret—just some honest questions that’ll help you spot mission drift before it derails you.

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Why Smart Charities Say No to Money (And Why You Should Too)

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The Charity That Said No to £200,000

1–2 minutes

Emma was halfway through her third coffee of the morning when the email pinged through. A major foundation. £200,000. Three years of funding. She read it twice, then immediately rang her chair of trustees.

“We’re not applying,” she said.

There was a long silence on the other end. Then: “Emma, are you alright? That’s two hundred grand.”

Let me tell you about Emma and Haven House—they’re not real, but their story is happening in charity offices across the UK right now, probably in one near you.

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Week 4: The Rainy Day Illusion: Running a Charity With Zero Financial Reserves.

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🛑 STOP Being Stupid: Week 4 of 40

1–2 minutes

Living Hand-to-Mouth is Not a Business Strategy

There’s a stupid idea floating around the charity sector that the most virtuous charity is the one that spends every single penny it receives the second it lands in the bank. This is often driven by a misunderstanding of what a healthy charity budget looks like.

A charity with no financial reserves is a time bomb.

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🚨 A Quick Update: Apologies for the Missing Post

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You’ll have to forgive me, but the Friday post for the “Stop Being Stupid” mini-series is currently absent. Normal service will be resumed soon, I promise.


Frankly, I’ve just spent six hours in A&E with my eldest son, who is 23. He’s been absolutely felled by the mother of all flu strains, which is bad enough, but here is the fun part: almost all of his symptoms were those of carbon monoxide poisoning. The doctor this morning thought they were too similar, which had me terrified, especially because of a mini-disaster at his work the day before where he had the potential to be exposed.

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The Teacup Test: The Simple Art of Not Being Ungrateful

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Read time: 7 minutes

This one’s for anyone who’s ever sent a funding report 48 hours late and pretended it was a “draft.”

Receiving a donation is like being handed a tiny kitten – delightful, fragile, and absolutely your responsibility.

For some reason, many charities treat a gift as a trophy cabinet moment. They grab the cheque, polish it off, and declare victory. But they’re wrong. A donation isn’t the grand finale; it’s the first chapter of a new contract. That gift can lead directly to the next one and secure the one after that. Fail to properly manage this first step, and the relationship will vanish long before the next funding round even opens.

A donation isn’t the end of a long, arduous process; it’s the slightly awkward start of a relationship that needs careful tending. If you want to stop this lovely person (or Trust) from deciding you’re a flighty, unprofessional mess, you need a plan. And it starts with a phone call.

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Week 3: The Most Basic Fail: The Non-Negotiable Necessity of DBS Checks

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🛑 STOP Being Stupid: Week 3 of 40

Read time: 5 minutes

The Great British Game of Risking the Children

Right, if you’re a charity that works with kids, vulnerable adults, or even occasionally has staff or volunteers interacting with them, this week is about safeguarding.

And frankly, this shouldn’t even need to be a post. It should be a flashing, siren-wailing sign in your boardroom that says: “CHECK YOUR BLOODY VOLUNTEERS.”

Yet here we are.

Because a shocking number of charities—particularly the smaller ones run by busy, well-meaning volunteers—still view the Disclosure and Barring Service (DBS) check as tedious paperwork. A box to tick. An admin burden.

It is not.

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