Because frankly, “New Year, New You” is a total shit idea.

The annual circus has arrived. Right on cue, we’ve hit that “Twixtmas” stage—that weird, blurry week between Christmas and the New Year where the “New Year, New You” industrial complex kicks into high gear.

I can’t look at a screen without being bombarded by adverts for PureGym memberships or “life-changing” masterclasses. My social feed is a toxic sludge of Dry January manifestos and, recently, people shouting about military calisthenics in the freezing cold. Even the supermarkets have swapped the mince pies for those “low-fat” rice cakes—which, for anyone watching their blood sugar, are basically flavoured cardboard disks that spike your levels if you even look at them sideways.

It’s a collective fever dream of performative productivity, and frankly, it’s a shit idea.

1. The Myth of the “Fresh Start”
The idea that you need a specific square on a calendar to change your life is the ultimate form of procrastination. If you’ve been sitting on your arse waiting for January 1st to “start” something, you’re not just behind—you’re probably going to quit.

Waiting for a “special” day makes your goals fragile. Just ask any regular gym-goer about the “New Me” January gym bunnies. They know exactly how long that burst of enthusiasm lasts before it’s chucked in the bin along with the leftover turkey. Pinning your ambitions to a resolution is counter-productive; the moment life gets messy, the “magic” of the fresh start evaporates.

You don’t need a countdown. You just need to start. And here’s the thing: “A start is a start, no matter how messy.” It doesn’t have to be a polished, cinematic transformation. It can be a total shambles, as long as it’s a move in the right direction. One step is always better than none.

2. Biological Reality (The Winter Hibernation)

Let’s be real about the physics here. We are in the dead of winter. The Winter Solstice only just happened. Look out the window—nature isn’t “grinding.” It’s dormant. It’s hunkered down, protecting its roots, and surviving the frost.

Trying to force a high-energy “launch” phase in the middle of a literal freeze is like trying to redline an engine that’s been sitting in sub-zero temperatures overnight. The oil is thick, the battery is struggling, and the metal is brittle. If you floor the accelerator before the engine has had a chance to warm up, you’re not going to get anywhere fast; you’re just going to snap something.

There’s actual psychology behind why this feels so wrong. Research into Circadian and Circannual rhythms shows that our bodies are hard-wired to respond to light levels. In January, our melatonin levels are naturally higher, and our metabolic pace often dips to conserve energy. This is what psychologists call “Seasonal Affective Reality”—not a disorder, but a biological cue to slow down.

Psychologists like Katherine Milkman, who studied the “Fresh Start Effect,” noted that while new dates can motivate us, they also trigger a “False Hope Syndrome.” When we set massive expectations in a low-energy month, we create a gap between what we “should” do and what our biology can actually sustain. The moment we slip once, we hit the “What the Hell” effect and abandon the entire goal because we tried to sprint before the thaw.

3. Internal Rhythms: Grace and Life’s Shit-Storms

This biological need for a “slow burn” isn’t just theory—it’s how we survive the reality of our own bodies and the chaos of the world.

Over Christmas, I’ve been keeping a sharp eye on my numbers. My doctor told me “diabetic in remission” is my new official term, and I intend to fuxing stay that way. But I didn’t try to sprint through December on a diet of steam and willpower. I gave myself some grace. I had the roasties. I enjoyed the season.

If I go to the doctors next month and I’ve put on a couple of pounds, that’s fine. It’s not a catastrophe or a failure; it’s life. I managed the intake and respected the condition, but I also remembered to actually enjoy the festivities.
That’s the learning point the “New Year” hype ignores: A one-day “failure” isn’t a failure. It’s just a Tuesday. Or a Christmas Day. Especially when you’re managing a long-term condition such as diabetes, or even just fuxing life’s regular shit-storms, perfection is a lie. What matters isn’t the lapse; it’s that you pick yourself up the next day and carry on.

Real life demands that you be consistent over the long haul, not perfect for a week in January. Longevity beats intensity every single time.

Gentle Mood Boosters for the Hibernation Phase

If you feel like you need a bit of a mental lift while you wait for the ground to thaw, try these low-pressure ways to declutter the mind:

The Digital Marie Kondo: Spend a quiet half-hour with a coffee going through your bookmarks or that “Read Later” pile in Evernote. If a link doesn’t “spark joy” (or if it’s a PDF from three years ago you’ll never actually open), bin it. It’s amazing how much lighter you feel when the digital clutter is gone.

Curiosity over Commitment: Instead of signing a 12-month gym contract in a fit of guilt, just have a wander through some options. Compare local clubs or browse some online learning courses. Treat it like window shopping for your future self—no pressure to buy in just yet.

Light & Air: Forget the 5 am military drills. Just find ten minutes when the sun is actually out to take a breath of fresh air. It’s about maintenance, not a makeover.

It’s Just Another Day
At the end of the day, January 1st is just another sunrise. If you want to start a new project today, brilliant—go for it. If you want to stay under the duvet and wait until February because it’s freezing and you’re still tired, that’s also fine.

Stop falling for the hype. Let the “winners” burn themselves out by February 1st. We’ll be over here, resting up and moving at a pace that actually lasts.

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About the Author
I’m the chief resident of The Art of Stupidity, a space dedicated to the reality that most of us are just winging it while pretending we’ve got a plan.

Currently, I’m a diabetic in remission – a title I earned through hard-won data and a refusal to settle for a life tied to injections. I intend to fuxing stay that way, even if it means navigating Christmas roasties with a bit of tactical grace.

I don’t do “lifestyle optimization.” I’m too busy wrestling with a decade’s worth of digital hoarding in Evernote, migrating to Notion because Evernotehas announced its latest price hike, and trying to find a system that actually works for a brain that’s perpetually “in the thick of it.” I write this blog because I’m tired of the glossy, filtered nonsense across all sections of life and work. Life is a series of beautiful, chaotic shit-storms, and the real art is learning how to stand in the rain without pretending you’re dry.

I’m just here to document the mess.